Blog / Lydia: Growing Into Who I Really Am
Lydia strolled into my office, trying to act nonchalantly, but she could barely contain her energy. It emanated from her in waves, finally bursting from her in a wide, open-mouthed grin. Her slow walk to a chair in the corner of the room couldn’t disguise her excitement; trembling hands tightly gripping a piece of paper gave it away as she carefully sat down.
“Do you see anything different about me?” she asked.
I slowly scanned her from head to toe, deliberately overlooking the paper. “Mmmmm... nope! You look normal to me – happy and very smiley.”
Lydia tossed her head back and laughed. “I passed my ServSafe test!” She waved the paper in front of her. “I got my certificate! I’m a professional!”
Her joy was infectious. It was a big moment - ServSafe is the leader in food safety training and certification, and the test is challenging - so we celebrated with squeals, clapping, and giggles. Lydia felt successful.
Success wasn’t a familiar feeling for Lydia. She struggled with delayed speech and language. She can think of words, but she can’t always say them. Lydia put her own words in stories when she was reading aloud. Her parents helped her fill in the blanks at home, but elementary and high school weren’t as accommodating.
“I was different than other people,” Lydia stated matter-of-factly. “I didn’t have good friends in school. People bullied me.”
“Why on earth would they bully you?” I interrupted. “Just because you struggle with words?
Lydia cocked her head and stared at me like I should know better. When I didn’t answer my own question, she barked out, “LOOK AT ME!” She waited a moment, then jabbed at her right eye. “Look at me.”
Lydia had a pronounced lazy eye. “I was in my own world of bullying because of this,” she said with resignation. “It made me different. People would pick on me and laugh at me, and teachers did nothing at all. I learned to fight back with my words. I would say, ‘God made me this way! I am happy He did!’ I would get tired of the bullying, though, and looked forward to breaks so I could get away from people.
“I didn’t think I would ever go to college. I was tired of people and how they made fun of me. But one day, I was at a Joni and Friends camp, and my mom talked to another camper’s mom. Her son, David, went to Shepherds College, and she told my mom that it was really good for him. So... I did an overnight! It was my first night away from my parents, and I thought it would be hard, but I did great! I came home smiling from ear to ear.”
“Do you know what I love the most about Shepherds College?” Lydia asked, leaning forward in her chair, her grin dominating her face. “The people! Isn’t that funny? They. Do. Not. Bully. Me. There is no bullying around me!”
Lydia sat back once again, her expression growing serious. “I didn’t have good friends until I got to Shepherds. Here, I’m close to everyone. We all understand each other. We know how hard it can be for people who are different.” Lydia pressed the fingertips of both hands together, then exploded them outwards in a dramatic show of jazz hands. “We came here, and we were like broken pieces,” she slowly drew her fingers inward and intertwined them, “that somehow all fit together to make a wholeness – one great Class of 2023!
“At Shepherds College, I didn’t hear ‘What’s wrong with your eye? You look stupid! Hah, hah!’ I only heard what God’s purpose was for me. He made me this way. He gave me a speech impediment and a lazy eye. He made me different – there is no one out there exactly like me – for a reason!
“I’m fulfilling my dreams at Shepherds College®. I’m here. I’m safe; no worries. I have people who support me. I love that. I’m so grateful I’m growing into who I really am.” Contentment settled over Lydia’s expressive face as she clutched her ServSafe certificate of achievement close to her chest.
“I found Shepherds for a reason, and I believe in the dream of ‘after Shepherds.’ I know there is something out there for me. I’m chasing a dream that I will catch.”
Published in Volume 6, Issue 2 of SOAR Magazine.
